For the last years, sexuality has changed dramatically in the eyes of society. Individually, sex has become more than a reproductive act. It is now a matter of bonding and pleasure, leaving the thought of having children as an optional and often disregarded element.
As the windows opened for sexual pleasure, we started getting acquainted with terms such as gender diversity and equality. Is this a positive or negative change we’re experiencing as a society?
Nothing is black or white, but we can definitely say that free sexual expression has many advantages. Some of them are short-term benefits such as the release of muscle tension and better pain management. Others are kept for the long-term, such as a reduction of prostate cancer risk and happier and more fulfilling life as a couple.
But, can we include better sleep among the benefits? In this article, we’re evaluating the answer through anecdotal and scientific evidence.
Does having sex help you sleep better?
There are many short-term benefits of sexual intercourse, and some of them may indirectly promote sleep. For example, when we have sex and experience an orgasm, there’s a hormone secreted in the body called oxytocin. It takes around 5 minutes to reach peak levels of oxytocin after orgasm, and it has soothing effects on the body. The primary purpose of oxytocin is to contribute to the interpersonal bond between romantic partners. However, it is also an antidepressant, anxiolytic, and anti-stress hormone. This could be one of the reasons why men and women sometimes feel sleepy a few minutes after having sex (1).
Another hormone that changes when we have sex is cortisol. This is the so-called sex hormone, beneficial for your circadian rhythm. It wakes you up every morning and helps you stay active. But it is out of control in anxious and apprehensive people. Massaging, stroking, hugging, and similar behaviors associated with sexual arousal and foreplay bring down cortisol levels. By doing so, they could contribute to bringing down your alert levels and achieving better sleep (2).
Pain reduction is another beneficial effect of sexual activity, particularly in individuals with chronic diseases. Multiple neurotransmitters in the brain and the spinal cord inhibit the nociceptive signals by nerve terminals. One of them is endorphins, the body’s natural morphine-like neurotransmitter. In other words, we start experiencing pleasure instead of pain, and this may contribute to falling asleep (3).
Muscle relaxation after sex is also widespread. Sexual activity tends to relieve muscle tension, even in patients with severe muscle spasms. For example, there are often painful muscle spasms in multiple sclerosis and spinal cord injury due to an intrinsic nervous dysfunction. These patients reduce the severity of muscle spasms for at least one hour after sex. This may contribute to their capacity to fall asleep after sexual intercourse (4).
With all of these influences, the association between sex and sleep becomes very reasonable, especially if you experience this effect first-hand. Many people with a sleep disorder also have a decline in sexual activity, and a bidirectional cause is possible. Inadequate sleep may contribute to sexual dysfunction, and no sexual activity prolongs sleep deprivation.
Many people believe that sexual activity improves sleep, and they sometimes use masturbation to help themselves fall asleep faster. According to statistics in an American study, 32% of women reported masturbating at least once in the past three months to fall asleep. An Australian study with men and women found that more than half of the participants had the sensation of falling asleep faster after masturbation (5, 6).
But is this a generalized belief some people have? Let’s see what does science has to say about it.
What the research says
One of the aspects of real science is that you need to replicate other researchers’ findings if you want to prove they are right. A scientific study can say anything, and the arguments can be persuasive. But if the same conclusions are not replicated in other studies, it won’t be considered a proven scientific fact.
That’s why the American and Australian studies mentioned above were recently replicated in over 700 people. These people came from different countries and completed an online survey. The study showed that more than half of the people experienced an improvement in sleep quality after sex. Some of them reported no change, and only 3% reported worsening their sleep quality after sex (7).
A more extensive study was performed in Norway, and 4000 participants aged 18 to 55 years were invited to participate in similar surveys. According to this study, both men and women perceived a soporific effect after sleep. Men were a bit more likely than women to feel sleepy after sex, but they both had similar experiences. Interestingly, men said that having sex but not having an orgasm had a sleep-impairing effect. But having an orgasm was associated with better sleep. Women did not report this difference around orgasm (8).
More recently, a study evaluated the effects of sex on sleep patterns and behaviors. This time, the investigators wanted to evaluate the differences between men and women and who fell asleep faster after sex. The investigators took college students of both genders and evaluated their postcopulatory somnolence. Both men and women were likely to feel sleepy after sex. However, women were more likely to fall asleep first. Unlike other studies, this one was specific for nighttime sex instead of daytime sex. According to the researchers, sleep’s sedative effects are more likely to occur at night, but they disagreed that men were the first ones to get asleep (9).
Some people believe that men are the first ones to get asleep after sex, and some studies confirm this assumption. Others do not. According to another recent study, this conduct may have an evolutionary reason. They mention that men who stay awake for a longer time after sex probably trigger a mate-guarding behavior that keeps them awake to protect their partner and favor bonding (10).
As you can see, there will always be disparities in what the studies find. It is something that happens very frequently when we try to study sex in the laboratory. People experience the same stimuli differently. They may have the same parameters, but many variants we don’t see constantly change the picture. This is something that does not happen with animals, and that’s why there are many studies in mice as well.
One of these studies in animal models evaluated how male rats experienced sleeping after having sexual intercourse. The investigators found that mice who had better sex also had a better sleep quality. They spent more time in the slow-wave sleep phase. This phase of sleep is fundamental for sleep quality. It is what gives you a better night’s sleep. A night of longer slow-wave sleep is associated with a complete recovery of the mind and body. It is the reconstructive sleep we all should aim for, and it was increased in mice with more sexual experiences (11).
It is possible that the link has psychological and physiological elements and that each one is important to trigger the effect. This may account for the individual differences of experiencing sleepiness or not after orgasm. Some people fall asleep very fast after sleep. Others do not and use this time for bonding and creating a relationship with their partner. Many people can do vigorous physical activity without a problem and have excellent mental activity tests after orgasm (10).
Thus, the answer to this question is similar to many other aspects of sex. We can’t study sex on a test tube, and we can’t study sleepiness after sex on a test tube. Each one of us has a different experience and perception about sex and sex-related behaviors. Similarly, some of us may feel particularly tired after having sex, while others do not have this perception. Depending on each case, we may or may not feel the so-called sleepiness after sex.
Sex or masturbation?
As you can see above, sleepiness after orgasm is sometimes evaluated through sexual intercourse. In other cases, it is assessed through masturbation. These are very heterogeneous studies that should be interpreted individually without generalization. Masturbation is not the same as sexual intercourse, even if both end in an orgasm.
Sexual intercourse is more likely to trigger sleepiness for different reasons. It involves physical activity and may lead to feeling tired and more likely to sleep. It is associated with cuddling, bonding, and other behaviors that increase oxytocin release, which has a sedative effect. Thus, you may not experience the same postcopulatory somnolence after masturbating. Moreover, it may not be sex by itself that makes us feel relaxed and sleepy. The sensation could have something to do with being close to your partner and having an emotional bond with him or her.
So, if you’re trying to solve any sleep disturbances, remember that you can do anything but forcing yourself to sleep. Being too technical about it could even give you an episode of erectile dysfunction, so it is better to let it flow naturally. Try not to use sex as a tool or a sleep aid and enjoy the moment. If you do, it will be more likely to fall asleep right after. And if you don’t, at least you will have a great time and enjoy an intimate moment of great sex with your partner.
Conclusion
There are many myths around sex topics. People talk about their own experiences of sex desire, sexual satisfaction, libido (sex drive), sexual stamina, and other topics. But our sex life is inherently different from each other, and we experience sexual intimacy and desire in a very personal way. The same happens with what we do and how we feel after sex.
According to sleep experts, there is a relationship between sleep habits and healthy sex life. But right after having sex, some of us experience sleepiness, and some of us don’t. Many studies show that people tend to have a better sleep quality after having sex or at least get asleep faster. And the association is very likely because oxytocin gets released and has a sedative effect; cortisol levels drop and help us relax, sex relieves muscle tension in some people, and it releases endorphins. All of these factors could potentially contribute to feeling sleepy after intercourse.
However, there are many variants involved. Oral sex and masturbation are not the same as vaginal sex. Bedtime sex may trigger sleep more rapidly than morning sex. Some studies mention that men are more likely to fall asleep after sex than women. Others show the opposite results. Even under the same circumstances, people of the same gender may experience postcoital time differently.
Thus, instead of using our desire and erogenous zones to achieve better sleep, enjoying the moment will probably have a better outcome. It is also a better idea than using sex as a tool.
